We can all use a little laughter as we try and make sense of this world. Love and light just isn’t enough to get through this shit. Please allow me to shine my weird inner light outward and give you my words of wisdom about my spiritual life experience:
- I was once asked how can I be spiritual and give healing sessions and also call someone a twat? I replied, “how can you have your head so far up your ass to not realize you’re a twat?”
- When you hear voices, ask others if they hear them too, if they don’t, it’s dead people.
- Never be afraid to ask, “what the fuck?”
- Always drink more than one Coronarita – always.
- If you drink more than two Coronaritas, eat something!
- Do at least one live broadcast in your lifetime from your bathroom sitting on the toilet. It just helps shit flow.
- If your cat jumps up on your lap while your on the toilet and you want to snap a picture, make sure you take a picture of the correct cat.
- Sword fighting with dildos WILL get you thrown out of an adult bookstore.
- When handling possessed dolls, wrap them up like a baby, that way the possessed doll is cool with you and nobody suspects anything.
- YES, yes you can pass your gay male friend off as your possessed doll/lovechild’s baby daddy.
- If you want a relationship reading and you cheat on your partner relentlessly, do not bring your partner to the reading with you. Geez!
- No, no I do not know when your dryer will sell on Facebook Marketplace.
I hope this peek into my spiritual life made you chuckle, you cannot make this shit up. Writing this makes me want to go drink Coronaritas.
Be well and above all else, love.